Glitter Diaries: Be Happy, Always
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"Love is stupid." This was something that D's best friend, R, recently wrote. R broke up with his girlfriend a few weeks ago. Unfortunately, the decision was one-sided, as his ex-girlfriend had been distancing herself from him, and on one occasion, was caught in a lie about her whereabouts. The story from R about that incident is that she claimed to be too busy studying to talk to him over the phone, but he later on found out that she lied and was actually in Ohio partying and getting drunk (she is much younger than him, and currently away at a college that is a 4-hour drive away from him). The relationship only deteriorated from there, and although I do not know all of the details, they did break up, thanks to her initiation. They ended things mostly on good terms, with her even hinting at them eventually getting back together, until he made the painful discovery of her "new" boyfriend, over social media, within just a few weeks of their breakup. It was immature and hurtful for her to announce it in such a way, and although he was gravely pained, I saw a silver lining. He was having a hard time getting over her, and this was the nasty push that he needed to move on. As devastating as it was for him, it needed to happen so that he could focus on better things. Up until seeing her new relationship status and the photos she has been posting of herself and her "new" boyfriend, I was not taking sides and vowed to remain neutral. However, after the way she handled the breakup, I can no longer stand by and watch this immaturity being hashed out in public on the internet. His ex-girlfriend, in my eyes, is a selfish, immature and inconsiderate person who lacks class and tact, which isn't surprising given how young she is, and the stage in life that she is at (she is a college freshman). I understand freedom of speech, freedom of whatever, it's her right to date whoever she wants, whenever she wants, etc., but there are just social cues and etiquette that need to be followed, and she was choosing to be very classless and tacky about it.
I gave some advice to D's friend, R, telling him that he should focus and work on being happy with himself before he starts dating again. Only then will he be ready to share that happiness with another person. For R, he was measuring his happiness based on who he was dating, and relying on the other person for happiness. He was never going to happy if he continued to measure happiness in that way. He needs to be happy all by himself, and learn to find happiness in himself before opening himself up again to sharing it with someone else.
I think that mantra that we all need to follow, including myself, is to just be happy, always. Easier said than done, I know, but if we can remember these three simple words, "be happy, always", when we are feeling down, then I think that we would all be in a better place.
DISCLAIMER: not all college freshmen are selfish, immature and inconsiderate.
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